Morning ladies, I have been waiting for this moment all weekend… just us girls, a good cuppa, and the kind of honest talk that only happens when grace is holding the space. Welcome to your Monday morning. You are so welcome here.
I don’t know about you ladies, but I have a place in my life where I try really, really hard. Where I pour out intention and love and effort and careful thought… and somehow, no matter what I do, it still lands wrong. I still say the wrong thing. I still do the wrong thing. And I walk away wondering… does any of this even matter? Does anyone even see what I’m trying to do here?
Can we be honest about that this morning?
Because I think every single woman reading this has a place like that. A relationship, a role, a season where the effort is immense and invisible all at the same time. Where you give your best, and your best somehow isn’t quite right. Where you love as hard as you know how, and the love gets lost somewhere between your heart and its destination.
For me, one of those places is being a mother-in-law.
I want to say that out loud this morning because I think it needs to be said. I love my children and their spouses with everything I have. I do things quietly, carefully, intentionally… hoping that somehow they will see through all of it that what I want most in this world is simply for them to know they are loved. That the gift they have given me… to love my children, to be trusted with their hearts… is something I cherish more than I can say.
And yet somehow… I am always saying or doing the wrong thing.
I’ve sat with that, ladies and really sat with it. That particular kind of helpless feeling when your intentions are pure and your heart is full, and it still doesn’t translate. When you give everything right, and it still lands wrong. It is one of the loneliest places I know.
And for a long time, I kept trying harder. Kept adjusting. Kept hoping that if I just got it right enough, loved loudly enough, served carefully enough… it would finally be received the way I meant it.
Until one day I just… gave it to God.
Not gracefully. Not in some beautiful surrender moment. More like an exhausted, “I don’t know what else to do with this, Lord, so here. You take it.” And in that giving up of trying to get it right… He met me. He always does, doesn’t He? Right there at the end of our own striving.
“And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” Colossians 3:17 NIV
Whatever you do. Not just the things that are received well. Not just the efforts that are noticed and appreciated. Whatever you do… do it for Him. Because here is the truth that changed everything for me…
The audience was never meant to be them.
Let me tell you about Randal.
I was ministering to a group of women on a beach one day. And off to the side, slightly apart from our group, there was a man sitting alone. Watching. When we finished, my husband asked me to go and speak to him. So I walked over to Randal… and I felt that familiar nudge from God. The one I know so well now. I took him to the water’s edge, and I washed his feet in the ocean.
And then something happened that I will carry in my heart for the rest of my life.
I was there in the cold water, hands busy, eyes down… and I heard him. Crying. Quietly, privately, in that way a person cries when they think nobody can see them. And when I looked up… ladies, there was glory on that man’s face. Not because of anything I had done. Not because I had said the right words or performed the perfect ministry moment. God had… shown up. In the cold water. In the quiet. In the middle of the most humble act of service I know how to give.
And in that moment… I (Me myself and I) didn’t matter anymore.
Not in a diminishing way. In the most freeing way imaginable. I had come to that beach to do what God needed from me. And then God took over. And all that was left… all that mattered at the end of that day… was this one question.
Did I love enough that God was seen?
Sister, that question has become the filter for everything. Every unseen effort. Every misunderstood intention. Every moment I pour out love that lands wrong, or service that goes unnoticed or effort that nobody acknowledges. The question is no longer “did they see me?” The question is “did they see Him?”
Because God sees every single thing you do. He sees the quiet efforts. The careful intentions. The love that got lost in translation. The service that nobody thanked you for. The showing up when it cost you everything, and nobody even noticed you came.
He sees it all, girlfriend. Every single bit of it.
“For God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them.” Hebrews 6:10 NIV
He will not forget. Not one act of love. Not one unseen effort. Not one cold water foot washing on a beach. Not one carefully chosen gift. Not one quiet prayer over someone who doesn’t even know you prayed it.
Not one.
So this Monday, if you’re in a place where you’re pouring out effort that nobody seems to notice… can I invite you to shift the question just slightly?
Stop asking “do they see me?” and start asking “do they see Him?”
Because when the answer to that second question is yes… it turns out that’s more than enough. 🤍
Abba Father, we bring You our unseen efforts this morning. The love that landed wrong. The service that went unnoticed. The trying and trying and not quite getting it right. Lord, remind us that You see every single bit of it. That nothing done in love for You is ever wasted or forgotten. Help us to shift our eyes from being seen to helping others see You. And in the moments we feel invisible… remind us that we are fully, completely, perfectly visible to You. Amen.
Coffee, Grace and Honest Talk…
